I normally don’t talk about my relationship as I sometimes feel like people would get sick to their stomachs if they heard what we are actually like. We sometimes get matching pimples and break into song at the same time with the same song just from hearing a phrase. It’s so bad that we actually help each other groom. But something happened this week that made me realize he is not my best friend which I always thought he wasn’t but now I’m sure of it.
Side Note: If you are my family and you are reading this, don’t worry you didn’t miss anything. I did not get married or eloped… yet 😉.
So yes, we are not married. I was previously married and my son is from that marriage. We were a mommy and son team for several years before Travis joined our little family. Then last December we added an addition to our family, Baby J. Since the beginning we made a conscious decision to be committed to each other and that works for us. Our relationship functions like any other, he caters to my crazy requests which the other day was to walk with me down the alley so that I could stop by the Poke Stop. I’m not ashamed to say that I play Pokemon and that is my one mindless game that I subscribe to keep me sane.
As we were walking down the alley, we saw a woman standing at her drive way with 2 saws. We said hello and kept walking. About 5 mins later, on our walk back she is still standing there and she is just looking at the trees. I was like, “Travis something is wrong. I think she needs our help. Let’s stop” which he agreed to stop. We approached her and she lets us know that the city had written her a warning citation for her trees that were extending past her fence and the next day the city would be returning to issue a fine if not fixed. Before I could even think about a game plan, Travis just jumps into action. He literally runs back to house and brings his truck along with some tools. Within 15 mins, he had cut a huge pile that filled up the back of the truck. Since we had the baby and the stroller, I told him to drive home without me and I would walk back.
On my walk back, I reflected on what had just happened. I enjoy helping others if I’m able to assist. One of the best feelings is helping someone without expecting to receive something in return. Purely doing a selfless deed. The fact that he enjoys and shares the same values as I do made me realize that he is not my best friend. My best friend would have told me, “Fine I will help this lady out because you are asking me but you owe me one.” He is my life partner! He is the man that I see walking life beside me, building me up and helping me along when I fall. And when you love someone that much and decide to share your life without engaging in marriage, it’s important to think of those times when it might not be all fun and roses.
Regardless if you are or are not married, it’s super important to have a will especially if there are kids and property involved. Did you know that there are different ways in which you can take title to a property? Some common ones are: Tenancy in Common, Joint Tenancy, Tenancy by the Entirety and Ownership in Severalty.
Warning: The information I’m about to talk about is not to be taken as legal advice. I’m not an attorney nor do I play one on tv. They also vary by state. 😊
Tenancy in Common allows for multiple owners to have a percentage ownership of the property and it does not have to be equal shares. Each share can be sold, mortgaged or conveyed WITHOUT consent of the other owners.
Joint Tenancy allows for multiple owners to have equal percentage of ownership. If one of owners passes away their share will be equally distributed to the survivorships.
Tenancy by the Entirety allows for only two tenants, they must be married, and they cannot sell or convey their share without consent from the other tenant.
Ownership in Severalty is when there is only a single person that owns the property.
If you are a parent co-borrowing on a home loan for your son/daughter, you can see how you might take title of a property different from a married couple or a couple that isn’t married. A property that was once owned by two people might end up owned by 6 people if one of them passes away and there was no will. Regardless of your relationship status, consulting an attorney when buying property is something everyone should do and while you are there have a will done. I love Travis so much that I wouldn’t want him to worry about our finances and fight with people over my belongings. And because of that love, I want to make things as easy as possible for him to move forward in the case that something happens to me. If you need an example of how crazy it can get for the other person, read the article about a woman that couldn’t turn off her dead husband’s cell phone because she didn’t know his childhood friend, you need to read it.
PS – If you are looking to move or relocate to the Dallas Area, let me help you find your new home. I promise to make your experience a wonderful one and I will entertain you with all of my stories. 😊
Karen Guzman with JP and Associates REALTORS